


Come Undone

by mdelpin, Oryu404



Series: Fairy Tail Dads AU [46]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Awkward Boners, Boys Kissing, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, Frotting, Honesty, Idiots in Love, Intimacy, Light Angst, M/M, Magnolia Dads Club, Making Out, Prompt: Is It Hot In Here Or Is It Just Me?, Talking, Teasing, ftdadsau, ftlgbtpride2020, gratsusummer2020, prompt: growth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:28:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24933739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mdelpin/pseuds/mdelpin, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oryu404/pseuds/Oryu404
Summary: With Aki staying at his grandparents' place for the weekend, and Lyon out of town for work, Gray finds himself home alone on a Saturday night. He asks Natsu to spend the night with him, hoping to get the chance to really be alone together for the first time.
Relationships: Natsu Dragneel/Gray Fullbuster
Series: Fairy Tail Dads AU [46]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1555675
Comments: 4
Kudos: 30
Collections: Fairy Tail Dads AU, Fairy Tail LGBTales, Gratsu Summer Solstice 2020, I Take Pride in What I Am 2020





	Come Undone

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written for both the Gratsu Summer Solstice Event hosted by the Tumblr blog @fuckyeahgratsu as well as the I Take Pride In What I Am 2020 event hosted by @ftlgbtales.
> 
> Want to talk with us about Fairy Tail, other animes, writing, or our stories? Click on the link to join our discord [The Unholy Trinity](https://discord.gg/HTnthVNZ3V)!

_July 24, 2021  
  
_

Gray grinned, noticing the slight flush on Natsu’s cheeks as he returned from the stockroom to find him sitting at the bar. He lifted the beer he’d gotten from Mira a few minutes earlier in greeting.

“Hey!” Natsu welcomed him cheerfully, shaking his hand vigorously and squeezing it gently before letting go. “You don’t usually come here on Saturdays. Meeting someone?”

Natsu attended to his customers while trying to hold a conversation, never straying too far from where Gray was sitting.

“I have no doubt Loke will track me down eventually,” Gray snorted, knowing how much his friend hated to be alone these days. “My parents took Aki and the twins for the weekend to give us ’kids’ some alone time. Rogue is holed up somewhere with Sting, but you are sadly working, so I came to visit, and eat.”

No sooner had he uttered the words than a menu had been placed in front of him.

“I’ll be right back,” Natsu said before moving further away to take some drink orders.

Gray flipped through the menu listlessly, not really feeling hungry but well aware there was nothing for him to go home to. Lyon was gone on some work-related thing and wouldn’t be returning until late that night.

“You know, I’ve been meaning to thank you.”

Gray looked up, startled, even more so when he realized it was Mira who was talking. “What?”

Mira giggled into her hand, her eyes twinkling with mirth, “I know we didn’t exactly hit it off the first time we met, but to see Natsu smile again, it means a lot to all of us. So, yeah, thank you.”

He had no idea what to say to that, so he just kind of nodded and hid in his menu, ignoring the sound of Mira’s laughter at his reaction.

“So, have you decided what you want?” Natsu appeared in front of him once again, reminding Gray why he didn’t like visiting him when he was working at Fairy Tail, especially on a busy night like this one. Fairy Tail was located near the college campus. It was a much more popular bar than Crime Sorciere, making it difficult to hold a conversation since Natsu had to flit around constantly.

“I’ll just have a burger,” he muttered moodily.

“Everything okay?” Natsu raised an eyebrow in concern.

“Natsu, it’s already getting pretty busy, why don’t you take your dinner break now, you might not get a chance later,” Mira suggested, “I’ll have them bring both your orders to the break room.”

“Sure, thanks!” Natsu grabbed the menu from Gray’s hands, put it underneath the bar with the others, entered Gray’s order in the computer, and added his own. He gestured for Gray to come with him, grabbing his hand as soon as they were out of view from any prying eyes.

They entered a small, dimly lit lounge with two love seats and a rectangular table with several chairs.

“This is the break room, huh?” Gray remarked, glancing around the room. He was about to say something else when he felt Natsu’s warm lips on his. He hummed contentedly, kissing back and moving his hands down to Natsu’s waist, pulling him flush against him until Natsu broke away.

“I’ve wanted to do that since the second I noticed you were here,” Natsu beamed, licking his lips slowly before leading him to one of the loveseats.

“Not gonna lie, me too,” Gray chuckled, leaning in for another kiss and feeling his lousy mood melt away when Natsu returned it. “I wish you didn’t have to work so much.”

“Yeah, well, bills don’t pay themselves so,” he shrugged, “This place isn’t so bad.”

One of the waitresses came in with their orders and two sodas, setting them on the table. “Here you go, guys!”

“Thanks, Laki!”

The waitress smiled at Natsu and Gray, leaving quickly to get back to her tables.

“And hey, free food!” Natsu cheered, moving to the table and sitting down to eat. “Gotta eat quickly though, I only get thirty minutes,” he explained, shoving a french fry in his mouth. “So what’s going on with you? You looked upset earlier.”

“It’s nothing, I’m just not used to being alone,” Gray shrugged, taking his seat and adding some ketchup to his burger. “It’s fine, Lyon will be home in a couple of hours.”

“Ah, the wife,” Natsu retorted, his mouth widening into a teasing smirk. “Where is he anyway?”

“He left this morning to go do some deposition or something in Oak Town,” Gray explained, taking a bite from his burger and washing it down with the soda. He glanced down at his watch to see how much time they had left before Natsu had to go back to work, frowning when he saw half their time was already up.

Gray knew he should be happy Mira had given them a chance to have dinner together, but it didn’t feel like enough.

He watched Natsu eat, smiling at how messy he was. It was really kind of cute. He continued to eat his own meal, grabbing his phone when a vibration in his pocket alerted him to a text. Reading it did not improve his mood in the slightest. It looked like Lyon wasn’t going to make it home after all.

“Bad news?” Natsu immediately asked, no doubt noticing the change in his expression.

“Lyon isn’t coming home tonight. I guess I’ll have the apartment to myself.”

“I wish I could come over for a bit, but I’m on the clock til 2,” Natsu lamented. “Still got a few minutes though, are you done eating?”

Gray looked down at the plate of food and nodded. He didn’t think he’d be able to eat any more.

“Well, let’s make the most of it then,” Natsu got up from the table, and after bussing their plates, he sat on one of the sofas and patted the seat next to him invitingly.

Gray watched him for a moment, the beginnings of an idea playing in his mind. He’d stayed over at Natsu’s place several times now, why couldn’t Natsu stay with him? With Erza and the kids always sleeping in rooms all around them, they’d never had the chance to really be alone.

He moved over to the sofa, purposefully ignoring the seat Natsu had indicated and choosing to straddle his boyfriend instead. Natsu’s eyes widened in surprise and his entire face, all the way to the tips of his ears, crimsoned at Gray’s proximity.

Gray leaned ever closer, his lips barely brushing Natsu’s before moving to kiss down his earlobe, blowing softly into his ear before whispering, “Stay with me tonight.”

He let his tongue slowly trace the back of the ear, smirking in victory as he felt Natsu squirming underneath him, his quiet moans making Gray forget where they were.

He continued to give small kisses along Natsu’s jaw until he reached those luscious lips. Working his fingers into the pink locks he loved, Gray tugged them roughly, and then he was kissing him hungrily, tasting the burger and fries on Natsu’s tongue as he sucked on it gently. Gray felt a twitch against his cock and backed away, realizing he’d gone too far.

Natsu was panting, his face still red as he stared up at him with eyes as wide as saucers. Gray scrambled off him, sitting in the spot Natsu had offered earlier.

“Oh God, I’m sorry,” Gray quickly apologized, “I got carried away, I just wanted to give you some incentive.”

Natsu waved his apology away, closing his eyes tightly as he struggled to get his breathing under control.

“Incentive, huh?” Natsu repeated suddenly, bursting into amused laughs, “Is that what you call that? How am I supposed to go out there like this?”

“At least your color’s returning to normal,” Gray informed him helpfully, earning himself a playful slap on the shoulder. “So, what do you say? Stay with me tonight?”

He wrapped his arms around himself, tensely awaiting Natsu’s answer, and when it didn’t come right away, he worried that he’d somehow pushed too far.

“I need to talk to Erza first,” Natsu finally responded, and although Gray wished he could have a more definite answer, he knew it was the best one he could expect. Neither one of them could really take off on a whim anymore.

“Okay, text me later?”

“Yeah,” Natsu agreed, closing his eyes again, “Can you let Mira know I’ll be out in a few minutes?”

“Sure,” Gray replied, still feeling a little guilty but not enough to really feel bad. He kissed Natsu as chastely as he could manage and made his way back to the bar.

  
0-0  
  


It had been hours since Gray had received Natsu’s text, but it felt much longer, almost as if time had stopped entirely. He’d tidied the apartment, changed his sheets, vacuumed, took a shower, and even did a laundry load, yet somehow it was still only midnight.

He was getting more impatient by the minute, and finally, he’d had enough of waiting. He went into his closet, changing into a shirt Natsu had once mentioned made his eyes look less droopy, which was about as close to a compliment as the jerk ever gave, and a pair of tight jeans. After examining himself in the mirror, Gray went downstairs to wait for the cab he’d called.

He looked up sexy drink names on his phone to pass the time until he arrived at Fairy Tail, laughing at how ridiculous some of them sounded and knowing the only bartender he’d ever be brazen enough to ask them of was his boyfriend.

Gray entered the bar, relieved to see the band dismantling their instruments. It was already one o’clock, and the bar was mostly empty. Employees were sweeping the floors and cleaning up the tables.

Natsu was laughing with the few customers that remained, and Gray’s heart skipped a beat at the sound. He made his way to the opposite side of the bar and waited for Natsu to notice him.

He kept his head down, continuing to look through drink names and deciding which one he was going to ask for.

“What can I get you?”

“I’d like some sex with the bartender,” Gray snickered, unable to keep a straight face.

“You’re hilarious,” Natsu rolled his eyes, “And here I thought you were going to ask for something classy like a Dick Sucker.”

Gray giggled again, “How do people order these?”

“You’d be surprised,” Natsu shrugged, “Unlike most of the people who ask for it though, you might actually get it.” He winked and mixed some sort of colorful drink, handing it to him. “Here, try this.”

Gray sipped it and hummed in approval.” What is this? It’s delicious!”

“Just a little something I like to call, my boyfriend got me all fired up at work and then left me to deal with a boner.”

“That’s kind of long, and oddly specific. I doubt it will catch on,” Gray quipped, snickering as Natsu flipped him off.

“I thought I was meeting you at your place,” Natsu remarked, “Didn’t want to be alone? or…. Couldn’t wait to see me?”

“Couldn’t wait to see you,” Gray admitted sheepishly, “Plus, if I cleaned anything else, Lyon might start leaving every weekend.”

Natsu laughed, “Considering your stuff is usually a mess, you’re probably right. I gotta go get started with clean up, but it should only be another thirty minutes or so.” He leaned over the bar, kissing Gray on the cheek and murmuring, “I missed you too.” before hurrying away.

Gray waited as patiently as he could manage, sipping his drink and playing a game on his phone until Natsu was finally done. He glanced around only to realize that the bar had emptied out of everyone but the employees.

“Come on, Mr. Incentive, let’s get out of here,” Natsu prodded, grabbing him by the hand once he stood up and pulling him towards the rear exit, calling out goodbyes to his coworkers on his way out.

“Where’s your car? Mine’s this way,” he asked once they were outside.

“No car, I took a cab.”

“Did you now?” Natsu’s eyes glinted with mischief right before pinning him against the wall of the building adjacent to Fairy Tail.

Gray didn’t fight, curious to see what his boyfriend would do, but he hadn’t expected Natsu to imitate his earlier actions, and before he knew it, he was the one squirming as a warm tongue swirled against his ear. Before he had a chance to get used to the sensation, Natsu had already moved to nibble and suck on his earlobe, his hand moving to caress the base of his neck, making Gray shiver with pleasure.

“Unngh, Natsu,” Gray groaned, feeling his cock respond to Natsu playing with his body.

As soon as it started, Natsu had stopped, and Gray could only stare at him in disbelief.

“Now, we’re even.” He smirked, continuing to walk towards his car, leaving Gray to rearrange himself and navigate his way to the car uncomfortably.

  
0-0  
  


The streets were empty as Natsu drove them to Lyon’s apartment. Gray wanted nothing more but to pay him back for his little stunt earlier, but they were in Erza’s car, and he didn’t have a death wish.

He waited impatiently for security to be done with them, for the first time since he’d arrived in Magnolia wishing that he lived in a typical building. One where he could do what he wanted in the elevator without it being transmitted to cameras downstairs. He contented himself with holding Natsu’s hand and massaging his knuckles, instantly forgiving him for earlier when he received a pleased but tired smile at his caresses.

Gray had no idea what to expect from tonight, and he told himself that even if they did nothing but sleep as always, he would be content. But they had been dating for about three months now, and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t hoping for something a little more physical now that they were alone.

He wanted to discover Natsu’s sounds when he was coming undone, see his face as he lost himself in pleasure and more than anything he wanted to be the one that made him feel that way. There were plenty of ways to do that without delving into areas that would make his boyfriend uncomfortable. At least that’s what Gray hoped. He didn’t really know how Natsu felt about it, which he knew was probably a bad thing.

Gray had never initiated the preferences talk, mostly because he was terrified of the answers. The way he saw it, the fact that Natsu somehow seemed to return his feelings was a miracle in and of itself, and he had no desire to push his luck.

They exited the elevator, and he took out his keys, fumbling to get them in the lock as his hand began to tremble. Natsu put his hand over his and helped him guide it into the lock.

Gray turned to smile at him gratefully, relaxing when Natsu said, “I’m nervous too.”

They entered the apartment, removed their shoes, placed them on the rack Lyon kept by the door and closed the door behind them.

Natsu whistled as he took in Gray’s efforts, “You weren’t kidding, this place looks great!”

_Not as great as you..._

Gray thought the words but kept them to himself, embarrassed by how childish they sounded even if they were true.

“Can I get you anything?”

Natsu shook his head, and Gray once again noticed how tired he seemed.

“You look beat, come on,” Gray grabbed him by the hand and led him to his bedroom, sitting him on his bed while he rummaged through his drawers for some pajama pants he could lend him. Finding a pair he thought would fit, he offered them to his boyfriend.

Natsu laughed, “That’s sweet, but I don’t need them. I only wear them at home because of Hana and Erza.”

“Oh,” Gray put them back in the drawer, and when he turned to join Natsu on the bed, he startled to find him standing behind him instead, wearing nothing but a pair of snug-fitting black boxer briefs.

Gray’s eyes traveled over Natsu’s body, taking in the toned muscles of his stomach and chest, his broad shoulders and the strong line of his jaw until he’d reached his face again, where a smile was waiting for him that made his knees weak.

“See something you like?” Natsu smirked at his reaction, looking way too pleased with himself, and as much as Gray wanted to come up with a snappy response to shut him up, he found his tongue was tied. However, other parts of his body were waking up, and they were quite interested in the display.

Gray closed the distance between them swiftly, realizing there was more than one way to shut his boyfriend up. His arms snaked around Natsu’s hips, pulling the slightly shorter male against him as his mouth quickly found its way to Natsu’s lips.

He heard Natsu’s breath hitch as his mouth was invaded, and as they kissed, Gray let his hands roam along Natsu’s naked back until finally settling on an area he hadn’t dared explore yet. At first, he was content to let them rest there, but when Natsu didn’t complain, he became more adventurous, squeezing and kneading the firm butt cheeks. Natsu’s groan excited him, and he gave an enthusiastic thrust, surprised when Natsu ground against him as well.

Gray could feel Natsu’s fingers fumbling with his shirt buttons, undoing them one by one until his chest was exposed. Natsu wasted no time pulling his shirt off, his hands exploring Gray’s chest, sending jolts of pleasure that soon had him feeling a welcome tightness in his pants. He moaned, and Natsu took the opportunity to interrupt their kiss and nibble at his collarbone.

“Natsssu,” Gray shuddered. He’d never realized his neck was so sensitive.

“I thought about you all night,” Natsu whispered breathily into his ear while gently running his fingernails across Gray’s scalp, sending shivers across his entire body.

“Me too.”  
  
Gray had never seen Natsu this turned on before, so eager to tease and touch, and it was making it incredibly hard to think about anything other than tossing him on his bed and ravaging him. Gray desperately wanted to drive him crazy with his mouth, hands, and anything else he could think of.

So he did just that. He picked Natsu up, tossed him on his bed, unbuttoning his pants, and undoing the zipper carefully before pulling them off. He glanced up to find Natsu watching his every move with an expression that seemed almost hungry. There was no hiding the tent in his underwear.

“Someone’s eager,” Gray teased as he neared the bed, his own arousal in full view.

Natsu chuckled but didn’t argue the point.

Gray climbed on his bed, crawling over to where Natsu lay and straddling him. He took a second to admire the man that lay beneath him before kissing him again, so deeply he could barely breathe.

“I love the way you kiss me,” Natsu breathed into his mouth, wrapping his arms around him and letting his hands slide down his spine, finally resting them at the small of his back.

It was such a simple gesture, yet Gray felt it echo throughout his entire body. He could only stare in shock, not accustomed to anything remotely like this. He fumbled for words, but nothing came close to expressing how those words affected him, so he settled for, “I love the way you make me feel.”

Natsu’s whole face lit up at his words, and Gray once again felt lost but also elated. He peppered Natsu’s jaw with kisses working his way down his neck. He felt Natsu’s fingers threading through his hair, tugging at it, letting Gray know he wanted more.

Gray worked his way back up, nibbling and kissing every spot he could, chuckling when Natsu captured his lips impatiently, his hands holding Gray’s head in place.

“You’re so beautiful,” Gray’s thumb caressed Natsu’s cheek gently, smiling as he wrinkled his nose at the compliment. “I want to make you feel good.”

“You already are, dummy,” Natsu replied, giving a quick ruffle through Gray’s already messy hair, “thought that was pretty obvious.”

“I can do so much better, though,” Gray promised, moving down to his throat and gently sucking on his boyfriend’s Adam’s apple, reveling in the vibrations he could feel against his lips as Natsu groaned softly.

Gray left a trail of kisses as he worked his way down Natsu’s chest until he reached his next destination. He blew gently on the perky bud, using his tongue to slowly lick his way up the areola, getting closer and closer but always stopping just shy of the nipple.

“Graaaaay!”

“Hmmm,” Gray agreed, finally flicking the nipple with his tongue and giving it a gentle bite.

“Fuck!” Natsu moaned, his fingers clenching around Gray’s hair and his hips thrusting upwards in a reflexive response, sending a shudder of pleasure through his body that drew out the moan.

The feel of Natsu’s cock rubbing against his, even through the fabric of their underwear, was enough to distract Gray from what he’d been doing. He ground against Natsu, using all the restraint he had in him to keep his movements slow. He glanced at Natsu’s face, wanting to make sure he was okay with this. But before he could ask, he felt Natsu thrust his hips up again.

“Natsu?” Gray hesitated, still worried until he saw the warm smile on Natsu’s face, and that was all the encouragement he needed to continue. He rolled his hips, watching that smile evolve into an expression he’d only seen in his fantasies until that moment, but none of them had been as satisfying as the real thing.

Natsu met his every thrust with fervor, the sounds of their moans filling the room, getting louder and more urgent as they got closer to their climax. Gray’s eyes hadn’t wandered from Natsu’s face since they had begun frotting, enraptured by the emotions playing out on his features, the trust reflected in his eyes. He fretted that maybe the constant weight of his gaze would make Natsu self-conscious, but then he realized his boyfriend had never looked away either.

Gray couldn’t remember the last time sex had felt this good. The movements in itself weren’t really any different, the familiar pressure building up inside him nothing new. But the feeling of warmth blooming in his chest as their gazes lingered somehow heightened his pleasure to an entirely new level.

Even after all those years of admiration Gray had experienced as a model, he’d never felt more wanted than he did now. There wasn’t a spotlight in the world he’d rather be in than that of those gorgeous green eyes, and it was an incredible turn-on.

“I’m close,” Gray panted, his thrusts speeding up now that he felt the telltale tightening that heralded his release.

“Me too,” Natsu gasped, his hands moving to Gray’s ass, pulling his hips down harder as he drove up.

“GRAAAAAY!” Natsu yelled, his body jerking as he came. The warm wetness of his release seeped through the fabric of their underwear, followed by Gray’s own only a few frantic thrusts later. They slowed down, continuing to grind together as they worked each other through their orgasms, making a mess on their stomachs.

“That felt so good,” Gray sighed, leaning down to kiss Natsu before collapsing on top of him, his arms burning from holding himself up as their thrusting had become more intense. He could still hear Natsu yelling out his name as he climaxed in his mind, and it filled him with a joy he hadn’t felt in years. He wanted nothing more than to hold him in his arms, whisper sweet nothings into his ear, and bask in the intimacy of the moment they had just shared.

He rolled off his boyfriend, lying down next to him and ignoring the mess they’d made for the moment. The sound of Natsu’s uneven breathing reached Gray’s ears, and he could only chuckle. He grabbed Natsu’s hand and brought it up to his lips for a kiss.

He’d loved the way Natsu’s eyes had never left his as they moved together, had felt connected to him at every kiss, every touch, every moan. It had filled him with a confidence he’d lost during his time with Siegrain, where it had always been more about the act than any feelings between them.

It surprised him a little that Natsu had yet to say anything, but he wasn’t too troubled. This was new, after all. They’d both need some time to adjust, it was only natural. He contented himself with visions of what their future could be, the dream he’d begun to build in his mind the first time he’d stayed at Natsu’s house growing bigger by the second.

They’d keep working hard so that Natsu could pass the rest of his tests, get a job with more regular hours, and free up his time to spend with friends and family. They’d be able to indulge in many more nights like this, moving their relationship forward slowly until Natsu was ready for more.

The silence continued to build, and now it _was_ making Gray nervous. He snuck a glance at Natsu’s face, a weight settling on his chest as he noticed the arm covering Natsu’s eyes, which had been so open and welcoming just a few minutes ago.

He wracked his brain, trying to think of anything he might have done wrong, but everything had been so wonderful. What had happened? Did Natsu regret it now that it was over? Had he not been good enough?

Gray knew he couldn’t give in to those thoughts, not when he’d worked so hard to move away from them. No, he should just ask.

“Natsu?” he winced at how shaky his voice sounded, but there was nothing to be done about it now.

He received no answer, feeding into his fears and filling him with the urge to get up and hide in his shower until he could think of a way to fix whatever he’d managed to do wrong.

He thought he heard sniffles and decided to try one more time, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Natsu replied, and now Gray was sure of it, Natsu was crying. He had no idea why, but it didn’t stop him from feeling miserable. Had he misunderstood?

“No, you’re not.” Gray sat up to get a good look at his boyfriend, “Please tell me what’s wrong, did I- did I do something?”

Natsu shook his head, still refusing to look at him. That connection Gray had felt between them just moments earlier seemed to evaporate, creating a distance between them that he was all too familiar with.

“I need you to talk to me,” Gray pleaded, “I can’t do this again.”

This time Natsu moved his arm away from his face, his expression puzzled, “Do what again?”

“I just... If I did something wrong, you need to tell me, don’t distance yourself from me and leave me to figure it out on my own.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Gray, it’s me,” Natsu admitted, wiping his eyes with his hand, staring down at the wedding band he still wore.

That was all Gray needed to understand what was happening, “Oh God, you weren’t ready for this, were you? I should’ve realized when you didn’t say yes right away.”

“No, it’s nothing like that,” Natsu cut in, but Gray was so caught up in his guilt, he didn’t fully register the words and continued to rush out his apology.

“I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have pushed-”

“What?! No, will you just listen to me?”

Natsu sat up and paused for a few seconds before he explained, “You didn’t push me to do anything I didn’t want to. I’m not upset because I wasn’t ready, I’m upset because I was.”

“I don’t understand,” Gray ran a hand through his hair, confused and still anxious because even though it seemed like he hadn’t done anything wrong, Natsu was still upset about something.

“It’s difficult to explain,” Natsu sighed, offering him a small smile.

“I really like what you and I have,” he grabbed Gray’s hand in his and held his gaze once more, “but every time we do something I’d only done with her, it’s like I’m leaving more of her behind, and it’s hard. She’s all I knew.”

“Oh...” Gray let go of Natsu’s hand, and unable to contain his disappointment, he hid his head in his hands, not wanting his boyfriend to see.

“Ugh, I said that all wrong,” Natsu groaned. “Please look at me?”

Gray hesitated, but he knew he couldn’t hide from this, not if he wanted their relationship to work. He’d known from the beginning that it wasn’t going to be easy, but he was determined to fight for it.

What Natsu had said wasn’t unreasonable, Gray knew that. Their previous relationships had been very different. It was natural for Natsu to want to cling to his happy memories, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to make new ones with him. He’d said as much. Gray just needed to accept that Lisanna would always be a part of Natsu and let go of the insecurities that tried to tell him that he wasn’t good enough for someone like Natsu, and he never would be.

He took a deep breath and tried to put his feelings into words.

“I get what you’re saying,” Gray offered his hand and waited for Natsu to take it, “You’re not ready to let go of Lisanna, and that’s okay, I don’t expect you to, but I don’t want to be a replacement either.”

“I’ve never thought of you as a replacement for her, Princess,” Natsu protested, “But I can’t just pretend those ten years of my life didn’t happen, either. Every day she gets further away, and I can’t help but feel guilty for letting that happen.”

“I guess I have the opposite problem, I want to forget the last ten years happened, but I can’t,” Gray lamented.

“Forgetting isn’t the answer, Gray.”

“I know, I just don’t know what is,” he answered honestly, hoping that Natsu would let it go but knowing it wasn’t likely.

“What did you mean when you said you can’t do this again?” Natsu asked, latching on to the words he’d blurted out in his panic.

Gray peered at Natsu, unsure of how much he wanted to share of his time with Siegrain, still concerned that Natsu would think less of him for some of the things he’d done. But if he was asking Natsu to be open and honest with him, he figured he should do the same.

“Siegrain had this thing he did where he’d act like I’d done something wrong, but he’d never tell me what. He’d just take off and leave me alone to figure it out, or even worse, he’d stick around and act distant.” Gray tried to keep all emotion out of his voice, but it was difficult. Just thinking about how that had made him feel was enough to put him back there.

“That’s awful! And you thought I was doing the same thing?” Natsu murmured in sudden understanding, “God, I’m sorry. That wasn’t my intention at all, no wonder you freaked out.”

Gray found himself enveloped by one of Natsu’s hugs, and he melted into it.

“You mean so much to me, and what we just did...it was amazing. I’m so sorry I ruined it.”

The words reassured Gray, reminding him that Natsu was a very different man from his soon to be ex-husband. It gave him hope that if they both kept trying, one day, they would both rise above the things that still held them back, together.

“You didn’t ruin it,” Gray objected.

“Gray,” Natsu declared, his features settling into a stubborn pout, “I ruined it.”

“Fine, maybe a little,” Gray reluctantly gave in, rolling his eyes at his boyfriend’s expression.

“I’ll make it up to you,” Natsu promised, “Next time it’ll be even better. I mean, I had no fucking clue what I was doing, and it was awesome, just imagine what it’ll be like now that I have some experience!”

“I’m gonna be honest, all I heard was next time,” Gray couldn’t help but tease, laughing at his boyfriend’s outrage.

He was glad they’d been able to discuss what had happened, and he did feel better knowing he hadn’t messed anything up.

Gray glanced down at his watch, groaning when he saw it was already close to four o’clock. It was so late, but he couldn’t really fall asleep like this, sticky with sweat and come.

“Hey, Mr. Experience, I’m going to jump in the shower to rinse off, you coming?”

Gray had to keep himself from laughing at the sheer panic on Natsu’s face, deciding to offer him a way out instead. “You can take your own shower if you want, but it’s late, and it might be nice to fall asleep together.”

He held his hand out, waiting for Natsu to make his decision. It took him a minute, but he grabbed it eventually, following Gray into the bathroom. They bickered about the water temperature as they removed their underwear and threw them into the hamper. Not that that was unexpected, but it took the edge off the awkwardness of being naked in front of the other for the first time, bringing back a sense of familiarity that they both needed after such an eventful night.

Once inside the shower, Gray grabbed his bodywash and poured a large amount onto a pouf, scrubbing himself quickly. He was about to wash his back when Natsu finally made his entrance. He grabbed the pouf out of Gray’s hand and took over, scrubbing his backside all the way down to his feet. Gray grabbed the shampoo and washed his hair quickly, rinsing off once Natsu was done.

Gray turned to face his boyfriend, watching as he scrubbed himself before handing him the pouf and turning around. He returned the favor, amused at Natsu’s behavior, but respecting the boundaries he had set. All of this was still new to him, and Gray knew he had to be patient. Besides, if things went well, there would be plenty of steamy showers in their future.

They dried off and got ready for bed. Gray grabbed two pairs of underwear from his dresser, tossing one to Natsu, who quickly put it on. They climbed into bed, completely exhausted from the long day. Gray pulled the covers over them, and soon they settled into their usual sleeping position of Gray lying on his back while Natsu rested his head on his chest, arm draped casually over his middle.

“Thanks for staying over,” Gray murmured, putting his arm around Natsu and pulling him closer.

But the only response he got was the sound of Natsu’s snores. Gray kissed Natsu’s head, pink hair still damp from the shower, and carrying the scent of his shampoo.

“Good night, my love. Sleep well,” he whispered, a fond smile tugging at his lips.

He closed his eyes, drifting off in no time at all.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: These two, always moving one step forward and two steps back! We ended up liking this one because it felt it showcased their personalities and it also got them actually talking about some of their issues, and hey what do you know the cockblock was temporarily lifted! 😂
> 
> We hope you enjoy it!
> 
> A reminder Gratsu Week is coming up soon. July 16-22 check out their [collection ](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/Gratsu_Week_2020) for more information as well as to see the beautiful event banner created by slayslotheskimo!
> 
> We hope to write The Horrible Return of Siegrain for this event so if you have been looking forward to that keep an eye out!


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